magicspidey:

Preach it Dave!! 

(via epicwinsauce)

(via inbirth)

(via epicwinsauce)

tyleroakley:

This really isn’t the place to be discussing that, Peter.

(via inbirth)

My dispatcher the other day

Me: Yeah, so I have this elderly lady here, and...

Dispatch: (Cuts me off) She doesn't fit in the truck, huh?

Me: What? No, I mean I can't get her car out of the garage. Sheesh.

thoracs:

thoracs:

maplewren:

12fiftyone:

12fiftyone:

Teenage girls using the word “broken” to describe themselves

Teenage girls

girls

Gir

G

(via epicwinsauce)

(via failship)

(via penishole)

(via penishole)

(via moralkevin)

Oh, it’s the magical mystery kind

(via jadedlittlebitch)

A Proper Rewrite

Me: Hey I haven't met you

Me: And I'm a little crazy

Me: I have your number

Me: I'll call you daily

Why can’t rappers rap about nice things?

”YEAH GIRL I’MMA TAKE YOUR CLOTHES OFF AND..
put them in a closet for you cause it’s polite.”

(via jadedlittlebitch)